Bothered

I don't know what to do now. I'm confused. I don't know what to think. I feel like screaming and just running away. I can hear voices in my head, making me dizzy and wanting to puke all my problems out. I know school isn't that much of a big deal, but what i have to go through to be accepted. To be known. To be liked. I just wish judgemental people, would judge, but help. But people nowadays just know how to judge, without even trying to get to know the person. I'm tired of getting judged with how i dress, if i wear tudung or not, or if i listen to hardcore. At least i know what i have to do as a muslim. Pray, doa, puasa. I know all of those things. Can't you stop forcing me to do things i'm trying my best to do? It may not affect you as much, but i'm hurt. I'm pressured okay? I'm deeply pressured. I know, as a girl, i'm supposed to cover up and conceal the things i'm not supposed to show to the world. But i'm really trying my best. Just because i take fashion in my school doesn't mean i go out in bikini's and wear short dresses showing bare legs. I wear jeans, long pants, long skirts, just like everyone else. Why do i still get judged? Getting pushed to do something, isn't a nice feeling. Why can't i just get support? Why does it have to be "ala budak tu tak pakai tudung, maksiat je la kerja dia"? I'm not a bad person. I've never killed anyone. I don't swear. I don't lie. I believe in Allah. I try my best to make everyone happy. Why can't people do the same?  Even my ustazah judges me. My ustaz as well. I want to make my own decisions but with all the pressure, it isn't exactly making me think right. My head feels like it wants to explode. I'm confused. I'm tired of listening to what people have to say. I can't take it anymore. I just can't.